How not to behave at a Chinese wedding: A user's guide

So my friend invited me to her friend's wedding.

I don't know why she did this. I wouldn't invite myself to my own wedding, let alone the wedding of a close friend. I'm fairly certain at least part of the reason for this unwarrantedly generous invite was the semi-awkward nature of the event: Both bride and groom were former colleagues, and that meant the whole office was invited--including my friend's former boss. Potentially awkard? I guess. But in a worst-case scenario, a random waiguoren guest can act as a handy human shield.

One interesting thing about this event was a total lack of anything North Americans would consider a "wedding ceremony." There was a brief spiel by the maitre d', a friend of the couple, who brought them both on stage and gave a brief speech on how much they loved each other. There was cake-cutting. But no formal ring exchange, no public contract-signing; certainly no religious overtones whatsoever (although rumours flew that this was a shotgun wedding because the bride is pregnant. Don't ask me).

Instead there was a catered dinner at a fancy dining hall in Shanghai's "Circus World." No circus, no acrobats and no prancing horses in this particular event, unfortunately.

But there was an open bar. And half a dozen Chinese men who thought it would be great fun to engage the waiguoren in a drinking contest. So who's complaining?